After we had our first baby, we knew we wanted another right away. Shortly before we conceived again, my husband suggested that we should wait till our next baby’s birth to find out of we would have a daughter or another son. Normally I’m not a huge fan of surprises. I like to know what is coming my way ahead of time. But this was to be our last baby so it was a once in a lifetime surprise. I agreed to wait to find out the gender and it was a seriously magical surprise. It was definitely challenging to not find out but the excitement was far greater. When my belly got bigger and I was obviously pregnant, everyone I spoke to would ask the usual questions, “When are you due?” and “What are you having?” I would tell them my due date and that I was waiting till the big moment to find out. Most people reacted completely shocked that someone would wait.They didn’t even consider it a possibility to not find out.
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Why We Waited & How I Almost Caved
Like I said, I hate surprises. I like to know what’s coming so I can plan and prepare as much as possible. When my husband suggested waiting and being surprised, I instantly just knew this was one surprise that I wanted. Maybe it’s because I still had control in making the choice to wait, or maybe the excitement was over powering. Not knowing during the pregnancy was a truly amazing experience. Feeling the life inside me but genuinely not knowing if I would have another son or if I would have a daughter was thrilling. The further along I got in the pregnancy, the easier it was to not know. I thought the tension would build and get harder but I just knew each day we were getting closer to finding out.I was tested at my 20 week anatomy scan. My toddler was about 18 months old and the novelty of seeing baby on the ultrasound wore off quickly. My husband had to take him out about half way into the scan. It would have been so easy for me to cheat and have the nurse tell me if I was going to have a boy or girl. But I kept my head turned when she told me to. As I said, it was my husband’s idea not to find out but it was this moment when I knew I really wasn’t doing it for him but for myself too.
Finding Out My Baby’s Gender At Birth
Throughout my whole pregnancy, I told my husband, doctor, and every one else that I wanted to be the one to announce it. It was a scary and emotional birth (read the whole story here! >> My Birth Story: Last Baby). When he was finally out, the doctor turned him around before placing him on my chest so I could see. Nothing can compare to the moment that I said “he’s a boy” through tears, pain, exhaustion, and my oxygen mask. It was more than worth the surprise to wait and find out in that moment. I really had no idea which way it would go. Not knowing if we had a son or daughter on the way made those first few moments with my second son even sweeter. I wish we would have waited the first time around as well! People never understand the appeal of waiting to find out but this is one of life’s moments you don’t realize how special it can be till you experience it.
How We Prepared For The Baby
After the initial shock wore off when I told people we weren’t going to find out our baby’s gender, many would ask “how can you prepare if you aren’t finding out the gender?” It really wasn’t that hard! If we had a boy, we already had most of the clothing and supplies we would need. If we had a girl, I could use my Amazon Prime and order a slew of girly things. They would be delivered before we even returned home from the hospital. We live in a world we can get most of what we need in any situation pretty quickly. If we had a girl and for some reason didn’t get around to shopping for a while, she would have been fine wearing big brother’s baby clothes for a few weeks till shopping happened. I’m sure she would have been given lots of fun pink gifts in her first few weeks of life as well. To make not finding out even more fun, as a habitual window shopper, I actually made two lists on Amazon to prepare. One for a boy and one for a girl. Baby would need a car seat either way, I just wasn’t sure if it should be pink or not! I wanted other things as well like new toys and a few new onesies, even if we had another boy. It was so much fun picking out two of everything and not knowing what one we would get. Here’s a peak at my boy and girl lists:
these are great tips! we didnt’ find out the gender of our first one until at the shower and after we opened gifts ha. it was a great surprise for our guests!
Some great tips! We found out the gender, but we went, as much as possible, with gender neutral — it would make it easier to keep the big items for a second baby even if it turns out to be a boy, and makes giving things away a lot easier, too 😛
I love this! I never find out the gender, not after 6 pregnancies! I love the surprise!
That is amazing! It is the best surprise
aww, i really wanted to wait and leave the gender as a suprise for my first baby but then when it came down to it i just couldn’t – i needed to know straight away! I have no patience!
It’s hard to not find out! I almost gave in a few times
We are currently 31 weeks along and we are not finding out! So exciting!! Whenever anyone asks how are you planning, I just tell them we are planning for a baby!! Can’t wait for that wonderful moment when we find out and meet him/her 🙂
You won’t regret it!!! It’s seriously so special!!!
Great post for buying for someone who doesn’t know gender either
The ultrasound revealed it was a girl and we had PLENTY of pink around the house… So it was a HUGE surprise to have the midwife put my baby in my arms and look down to see we actually had a boy!! (Yes, even with modern technology, this can happen) It was so shocking and delightful that we’ve decided to not find out the gender the next time we have a baby 😊